03-07-99

Yes--the third draft is complete. BUT I can't read it. Having some technical difficulties with PC at work so I can't print it out yet. (I don't have my own printer.) Reading it on the monitor is never the same, like it is on paper, so I'll wait until this minor problem is rectified.

One thing for certain with this next draft--I'm focusing on individual scenes like they were mini scripts: sharpening dialogue, trimming exposition, and visually heightening each scene. So far, in the first 3 drafts, I have worked on the story as a whole (which one should) but I feel like I'm starting to spin my wheels a bit. Not that I'm getting bored--just need to feel like I'm moving on to something new/different. If there is indeed any major gaps in plot development or story construction, I will look at them in the 5th draft.

One thing I KNOW I need to look at is this whole deal with 'character history.' It's hard to bring together over 30 years of history in 2 short hours but I'm teetering on a fine line between the fans and the general public. I have to maintain interest on both fronts so I can't get too redundant (for the fans) yet can't be too vague (for the public).

Let's put it this way:
I write a script for a "Star Trek" episode. Most everyone knows something about ST. If I'm not too careful and not give just enough history, some poor fool will be confused why Mr. Spock has pointed ears. The obvious answer: most everyone knows Spock is a Vulcan, hence the ears, but there has to be something in the script that leads those 'not-in-the-know' to understand why Spock is different.

As far as BJ, many fans know the history between DD and Kingpin and Bullseye. Most of the public doesn't. I realized I had only one confrontation between DD and Bullseye, yet they've obviously clashed in the past, though I don't have anything that eludes to this. Bullseye is in prison (in the beginning) because of DD--but I never show why. There's a strong animosity between the two--but nowhere do I show the reasons why. This is something I MUST work on.

Same thing with the Kingpin and DD. Two scenes yet no "history." A case in which I do create history is between Elektra and Matt (DD). At least when it comes to these two, there's a rising action which leads to their "confrontation" making sense to both fan and non-fan alike.

Another thing I wish to work on is a link between DD/Elektra and Kingpin/Vanessa. Each male had his own agenda yet there is one thing that will divert them--the female. They do appear opposite at first (DD driven by the female/Kingpin not) but I want to show, that despite how driven they each are, they each get turned in a different direction because of the woman in their lives.

Kingpin states to DD around PP 60:

"We are but two at opposite extremes
of the pendulum. If one fails, the
other will surely follow. We need
one another to survive."
Remember now, DD/Kingpin are not the protagonist/antagonist. The antagonist (besides Bullseye) is their own "selves." I want each of the 4 individuals to fight their own personal demons. Bullseye is easy as his mental state is in constant flux and has wild delusions of split personalities. The others (especially the K-Pin) are much more subtle. I need to play with the above quote and figure how DD/Kingpin's troubles are similar yet opposite.


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